PREMIERE : Carly Shea /// Feel (Do I Have Anyone?)

The pandemic has affected music videos. While a lot of artists are hitting record on their zoom calls and calling it a day, some musicians use these constraining times to play with the form and find news ways to collaborate. That’s exactly what Carly Shea does with Feel (Do I Have Anyone?), the new visual counterpart to her bittersweet R&B ballad, a concept developed in collaboration with the Russian dancer Emphis. We had a chat with Carly to learn more about her new single.

What’s the inspiration behind Feel (Do I Have Anyone?)?

Feel (Do I Have Anyone?) is a song I wrote a few years ago about the emotional struggles I was experiencing at the time. If I remember correctly, I was going through a lot of turmoil with past family troubles and was putting a lot of pressure on myself to figure out life. I opened the song with "It's all impossibilities..." because that's truly how I was feeling. It might be a weird belief, but I think people default to a certain way of thinking or feeling when things become difficult. For me, that kind of translates to anxiety. It's something I've been working on and part of working through that has been through songwriting. Feel is a reflection of that process.

How did you produce the track?

So this was a track that was primarily produced by Thankyoufatmatt in Brooklyn, NY, in Pro Tools. Matt was one of the first producers I ever worked with on original music (he did Forever and Waste My Time) and he helped Feel deviate from the typical emotional ballad. I came in with the lyric ideas and melody and while in his studio, we built out from there, throwing in sounds like accordions and such. I feel like the song took a twist when Matt built the bridge which crescendos and explodes into a key changed chorus. In a way, I think that the song ending on a higher note gives this song about hopelessness a plot twist of optimism.

How did you settle on this idea for the video?

The video came way after the track was made. A few months into the pandemic, I told myself I wanted to continue releasing my work though I was lacking visual components to my songs. I looked through the tracks I had ready to go and was trying to figure out which one listeners might connect with. It was pretty clear to me that Feel was that track after re-listening to it. Though it was older and produced in a more natural style than my upcoming work, I felt like the feeling and message behind the track was more relevant than ever... "dealing with yet another break, a heartache, bills to pay, too long."

This pandemic has been traumatic and universally stressful for people, those who have lost loved ones, businesses. In my experience, I was faced with a large amount of solitude which was both difficult and somehow healing. I wanted the song to reflect my experience with the many days I struggled to get out of bed and get through my day. I had so much time to worry about the future, process my mom's recent death, having to face a former abuser being brought to justice by the media...it was all too much. So I wanted to show my truth in this video and I was lucky to have that brought to life by dancer Emphis. I came across her online and reached out with my idea - a black and white video showing her emotionally turbulent struggle to dance her way through a daily routine. The reversal of the film in the middle (edited by Dimitar Drew and Wojciech Dziwuk) shows her struggle repeating. There were a ton of days in the past few months where I felt like I was in a loop. This video showcased that feeling.

What was your reaction when you saw the finished video?

My jaw dropped. Emphis, Dimitar Drew, and Wojciech Dziwuk brought this to life with my simple idea of a struggle to dance one's way through a daily routine. This was truly in their hands-- from the choreography to the cinematography and editing. Credit really goes to them because the level of time and care that was put into this video far surpassed what I expected and I'm so grateful. This is a video that I hope people can appreciate not only for the clear dance skill of Emphis, but for the relatable story that is being told in her routine.

How is life in NYC nowadays?

Different! But still NYC. It's a lot quieter than before - I've never been able to easily cross 8th Ave without fear of a mad rush of taxis. It's still. Things close around 11 and most of the tourists went home. They say it's the city that never sleeps, but these days we're living in an anomaly. But it's necessary to keep people safe. I'm proud of New Yorkers for taking the precautions necessary. And in a way, there's a bit of magic in the stillness of NYC. We're getting to view the city through a lens that no one expected. I'm trying to take advantage of the quiet to look around a little more and appreciate the city without the constant buzz.

What music have you listened to or discovered lately?

I've been listening to Le Flex a ton! He sounds so close to George Michael, it's crazy. Let's see... Remi Wolf, Arthur, Teyana Taylor, old Trey Songz <3 I also somehow just discovered the track Rain by SWV and cannot tell you how many times I have looped that track. I don't know about you, but I get a little obsessive when I find a track I love and listen to it way more times than I should.

What’s next for Carly Shea?

Hopefully good things! Hahaha. I've begun retooling my approach to releasing music with the guidance of someone on the business side of things, so I feel a lot more organized. I'm making a ton more tracks and also hopefully filming some videos for those soon. Another thing to keep an eye out for is merch! I'll hopefully be launching a site with some rad accessories to purchase. But all in all, making long term plans for larger moves and can't wait to share with listeners!

Follow Carly Shea

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Cover photo : Draco Manision